Is that your a new hair color or the left over buffalo sauce..?

I'm 28 years old & i've never colored my hair by myself. For some of you that's nothing impressive because you weren't gifted with white, wiry hairs that make their appearance on your head with such gusto as Tom Cruise on Oprah's couch that one time. For years I was against the whole doing anything that's not natural for/to my body. Well, that shipped sailed about 2 & 1/2 years ago. I was going through a difficult breakup & had transformed into this new sort of butterfly & was all into trying different stuff, so I temporarily dyed my hair just to see if I'd like it. I chose a deep red because I felt that would look good with the freckles & pink undertones in my pale skin. A few months later I chose to get it professionally done & haven't looked back since. People say the color looks like I was born with it. "Weh heh heh ellll, thank you," I say. 

Unfortunately, I have these really amazing white & grey hairs that love showing off. And with a medium brown natural color & a deep red artificial color, those bad boys stick out like Willie Nelson at a 4 year old's tea party in the Hamptons. (no idea why he was the first celebrity that popped into my head) So, I have to keep my business colored more often than most & tonight I chose to do it by myself to save a little cash. 

This was after I scrubbed my skin to remove
the evidence.

Currently I'm sitting waiting for the timer to buzz. It looks as if I dunked my head into a barrel of Sriracha sauce. I have no idea what it's going to look like. This is the first solo box dye I've experienced.  The 3 times before I had friends do it; 1 was for Halloween, 1 for a play I did in Georgia & the last time was when I was seeing if I'd want to dye my hair officially. So, it's in. It's on my hair & my scalp & pretty much my entire body. I'd be working hard for a minute & then look down to find myself & pretty much every surface in the bathroom covered with this sorta thick red-orange goo. Slowly but surely it has gotten progressively darker & I'm scared that when I step out of the shower I'm gonna look like I should be in a Pink video. I thought this picture showcased the hot sauce nicely. 

I remember the time my friend temporarily dyed my hair (for the play), I had my eyes closed as I began washing the color out in the shower & when I opened them, I screamed. It looked like I was at a crime scene! Red was EVERYWHERE.

Okay. Timer went off. Let's go see what's what..

..oh my gosh it looks good. I think I even just heard a few catcalls from across the street. S'alright ladies! If you want some better color on your head between salon visits, I now can say I trust & recommend Garnier Nutrisse Ultra Color -R2. I'm not sure about the other colors, but I imagine they're probably alright if this one is. Pretty spot on color match to what I was getting before. Maybe even better than my last salon visit & this was $7. Talk about saving $60. Yeeeeehawwwwww. 

Now, all I can think of is buffalo sauce. 

Relation-ships.

Yup. 'Relation Ships'. It's a world-wide chain. You take a cruise with another human. At first you're excited because you saw the add one day at the doctor's office & you worked up the courage to call & find out more. Turns out you're available to go so you buy some new clothes to get ready for the day you take off. You learn how to pack things tightly (take that how you want), you read some tip books & blogs, you make sure you're not late. (Again, take that how you want to) So, the day comes: you show up & you hop on the ship. You're nervous & unsure how to stand & worried you're not gonna like it or have fun. So far so good. Still in major analysis zone though. Welp after a while, you get to your room & clean up, but then you're not sure after that. Do you venture off to the areas you haven't been to, yet? Try out the midnight yogurt bar? Again you work up some more courage & you decide to take it to the next level. Everything keeps going okay, so you stick with the routine you've gotten used to. Then after a little while you decide it's time for some introductions. You merge the worlds, shake everybody's hands.  Everyone liked everyone! Yay. You can continue. As the time goes by, you get farther out from shore. Just deeper & deeper into the big journey on the ocean & you feel so confused when you think about what life was like before. And then you think I couldn't possibly live life without this cruise ship. It's just how you want it. It's like you have these buffets that offer so many different things but easily & at your finger tips. Who knew trying new things wouldn't be difficult!  You can try something new whenever you wanted. You know it so well now, you never have to worry how it's gonna take certain things. It's almost like you know how to manipulate it. Just kidding. But sort of, ya know? Eh..okay. This is taking a while. Who knew I was going to get this into this cruise analogy? So anyway, it's pretty close to the same thing. 

The last connection I'll describe is that there are so many different types. You've seen all the commercials for the different styles. I've had a few different ones that's for sure. And they all have their benefits afterwards. What you took away was like a new gadget to add to your tool belt. Definitely had the ones that redefined me as a human. It's a fact that the shell of me is similar, just a lil more tired at times & with red hair, but the junk inside has grown & evolved in the best ways possible to have become this person that likes herself much more, feels comfortable to have an opinion & likes to wear lipstick everyday. It is crazy to try & think like my 5 year ago brain did. Can't do it. Don't worry about it. I don't want to ever go through the crap I did before again. That was some low stuff. BUT. BUTT  if I have to have to have to in order to get to where I am now.. WHERE'S THE SIGNUP SHEET? I'm thankful for the me that's bumming around town these days. It feels as if I have climbed a really tall something, like the Crag. Remember that? Gosh I wanted to be on that show so badly when I was a kid. GUTS RIP. Where are you now, Mo? Did I lose some people? Mmk. Relating ships to one another. Yes. I've had my share. It's also bizarre to think about how resilient we are. I mean, damn. Our skin is surely made of rubber with like the energizer bunny laced inside. I was especially surprised to believe that I was able to come back from the times when the Avalanche just kept falling. It's not that easy, world. 

Then there's all that time where I was single. Lots of Gilmore Girls & the new Sherlock Holmes movies. Lots of solo kitchen dancing where I'd end up lying on my kitchen floor watching fan spin & counting the lady bugs on my walls. Lots of cereal. So much cereal. My classic moves usually included the following: come home after work, cook something, eat it while watching GG, continue to lie there, eventually peel off certain pieces of clothing, grab the cereal box, lie back down, start to doze off with all the lights & too many layers of clothes on - usually my shoes, GG still, and I'd wake up with various dishes in my lap and/or cereal in my hair at 3 AM, then I'd finally get ready for bed. My best nights, notice how I wrote 'best' - we're not gonna discuss the worst ones, most of the times ended with me waking up at 4 to find my mug of tea spilled in my lap & on my sheets, I'd proceed to cover it with a towel & fall back to sleep. 

I wish I could sign up for one of those monthly clubs that sends you stuff except this one would be for new kinds of cereal. HEAVEN. 

More food in hair related stories to come. Lata flava. 

The beginning. The intro.

"Look out world. Here comes Jonette!" Growing up, this is what my Nana would tell me to say out loud when I would wake up. This was and is how I was encouraged to greet the world each and every day. Saying this would give the planet a moment to catch her breath before my feet hit the floor. It was the calm before the storm; the eye of the hurricane; the brief commercial break before the winner was announced on American Idol; the last chance everyone else would be allowed to goof off before my kind of party entered the room. This was how I was raised. I was taught never to settle; to constantly keep reaching for my dreams; to be the good everyone else saw in the world; to make a difference; to make it better; to "make 'em laugh"; to be myself & to never be sorry. "Don't say 'you're sorry'," Nana would say. "You're not a sorry person!" Followed by a sip of her tea & a sweet pinch on my rear, Nana would have gotten her 'sugar' from me, her one & only Peanut Butter. She's the queen of my life I attempt to copy. Maybe she takes a bite of an apple and then goes over to kiss her sweet Johnny mine. That's my Granddaddy & that's what she calls him. I learned how to spell 'Oldsmobile' whilst sitting in his lap in the front seat of their car. I fell in love with space and God and learned how to use my imagination because of him. He is the smartest & most gentle man I know. Their kids, my mother & uncle, are a hilarious set. The love those two show for their parents is unmatched. Their generosity & thoughtfulness is something I strive for daily. My father, a man with an enormous amount of intimidation factors is the sweetest teddy bear of them all. He has the biggest heart & would literally find a way to lasso Pluto for me if I said I felt sorry for it & thought it needed a new home. My dad's mom, who's probably playing Bridge in Heaven right now, lived with such a calm sense of style & love for her son. These are some of my immediate family; the ones who have the biggest chunks of my heart at least. And I guess I felt it necessary to gush about these people. Well, now you have a better idea of why I am the way I am. I've been through a lot that has transformed me into the newest version of myself, but no doubt this group had some hands in the mix, too. 

Some of the above & a few other friends have been saying for years that I should start a blog. Well, I finally sat down with enough of an attention span to do it. This is kind of one of those streams of consciousness landing pads. I couldn't tell you what's gonna be up in this thing the next time, it's gonna be an interesting ride. I hope to one day know what I should be doing with my life. I'm searching. Always searching. So.. I guess we'll figure it out together. I appreciate your um.. patience with the lil trip I'm going on. I'm at a place in my life where I feel like there are 15 different paths I could possibly travel, but the map I have is faded & has too many coffee stains to be readable. Alas, here I am, kind of pacing, posing for attention every so often, just wondering & waiting for life to pull me strongly enough down one of those paths. Life doesn't make sense at times. This is something I have to keep reminding myself of: I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW EVERYTHING nor what happens next. I don't have the TV show series booklet that give us a summary of each season. My life didn't come with that one. It did however come with the 'How to create an awkward moment anywhere & with anyone' booklet, the 'How to choose every wrong way to do something before you choose the right one' booklet, the 'Wanna go for all the jobs you never ultimately wanted? Here's how!' series & the 'You're never gonna poach an egg. Stop trying.' pamphlet. My life's not THAT sad & bland. No. Surely not. It's not. It's not? It's snot.

All for now. *dramatic wink*
Come & get me.